While I was sick about 2 months ago someone left a pretty interesting comment on one of my toy reviews. It was pretty interesting so I’ll lend my two cents.
“Hey N’Jaila, I was wondering what is your take on racism in escort communities. Sorry this isn’t on topic relative to the review, but I’ve been trying to google it since my friend was talking to me about the “no black men” policy some escorts have. I even read a blog post from a white escort, and while I know women are entitled to do what they want with their bodies and to keep themselves safe, especially in that line of work, it just seems all kind of wrong to me. I mean, we don’t even need anti-miscegenation laws or the sometimes seen lynch mobs anymore b/c people self-select, and in very predictable ways, on and off line. In blatantly racist ways. It’s just something I’ve been thinking about b/c I’ve considered escort work and it’s difficult to navigate this troubling dynamic. And of course as a black escort I’m worried if I could even make a living. Cause the discrimination goes both ways, I’d imagine white escorts get the most business in spite of age and appearance at time. Oh and I realize you may not know much about escort side of work, but it’d still like to hear based on your experience, especially as a woman of color.”
Thanks for the questions, its a pretty complicated bunch to tackle. First, its very hard to say where professional “obligation” starts and preferences end when it comes to sex work. I’m not an escort, but I have been involved in various forms of sex work. I have seen many exotic dancers ignore and even rudely rebuff men of certain races for various stupid reasons. One girl didn’t give dances to Indian men because she didn’t feel they tipped enough. Another dancer I know was afraid to be seen giving dances to Black men on the club floor for fear of losing the tips of White men, she would take them to the VIP portion of the club. Neither of these women felt they were racist, or acting unfairly, of course the fact is they made judgments on clients or customers based their race. If it talks like a racist, and acts like a racist chance are, yep You are a RACIST. Even if you do so not because you actually feel superior to another race , but the supposed fear of losing the money of other racists. In that case not only are you racist but a coward as well. Its even more troubling when workers charge men of color MORE for the same service all the while proclaiming to have policies that exclude them.
As I said before I’m not an escort but for a class project I did pose as one. One of the most depressing things I experienced during that time was getting calls from Black johns who practically begged and offered more money for me to see them. I asked if they did so often and many of them said, “yes”. Personally I would never PAY for the attention of a racist, but there are men that are willing to so the practice of discrimination will continue.
As for the discrimination that happens for Sex workers of color, yes its a very real thing. A lot of ads for dancers, models and even escorts will say they are looking for “classy” or “upscale” which is really just code for “white and thin”. Many places will charge you more to work where you will be paid less. There is one upside, women of color are usually billed as far younger than they really are and therefore last longer at some agencies which means a longer career.
If you are thinking about being an escort please consider the fact that his line of work in the US is illegal. You can lose your vanilla job, even be evicted from your apartment if found out. Even more important than that consider that there are man STDs and STI that you can get even with the use of condoms. An alternative to escorting might be exotic dancing or web cam modeling, both are legal and reduce the amount of dangerous contact exponentially. Remember for a Black escort , most of your johns will expect to pay you less for more, many agencies won’t hire you and if you are ever arrested you’ll most likely receive a harsher sentence than your white counterparts.
I hope I offered some insight into this topic for you, please be safe,
muaaaaaaah!
‘Jaila
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