{"id":1474,"date":"2010-12-14T12:02:46","date_gmt":"2010-12-14T17:02:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blasianbytch.com\/?p=1474"},"modified":"2010-12-14T12:10:13","modified_gmt":"2010-12-14T17:10:13","slug":"j-t-tran-asian-pick-up-artist-explains-his-art-part-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blasianbytch.com\/?p=1474","title":{"rendered":"J.T Tran- Asian Pick Up Artist Explains His Art Part 3"},"content":{"rendered":"
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\"\"<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

continued from parts\u00a0one<\/a> and\u00a0two<\/a> .<\/span><\/h4>\n

J.T comes clean about “negging” , White girls and what’s his end game. <\/span><\/h4>\n

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Something I really wanted to ask you , and I\u2019m being pretty candid here, but from what I\u2019ve heard and experienced from other PUA I get the feeling that to them women were some sort of commodity there for entertainment. That makes me feel like an Xbox. I don\u2019t want to be an non sentient object\u00a0 or just arm candy-<\/strong><\/p>\n

(laughs)<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t want my pussy to be just a way for you to feel better about yourself, you say that you teach self improvement but so many women feel the way I do about the Seduction community, what , if anything, do you think can be done to change our minds?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Honestly, you pointed out the term \u201cPick Up Artist\u201d has a pretty permanent stigma associated with it. That\u2019s something I always fight. \u00a0People make certain generalizations and associations; I\u2019m in this industry so I put down women, I hate women. No, one of the things we teach our Asian guys is go up to a beautiful woman and tell her she\u2019s beautiful and get to know her.\u00a0\u00a0 There are times during the weekend where we have all these women in one space and they\u2019re being told they\u2019re gorgeous, beautiful and sexy but more Asian men in one night than they have their entire lives.\u00a0 So for us we are no putting down women as a tactic, like negging-<\/p>\n

What is \u201cnegging\u201d?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Negging was something mentioned by Mystery. I guess he\u2019s one of the godfathers of the industry and he had that TV show, – great guy, I love him, respect him.\u00a0 His tactic can be useful , but it definitely gave the Pick Up Artist\u00a0 movement a negative association.<\/p>\n

Negging is a negative; you are intentionally giving a girl a backhanded complement to disarm her \u201cbitch shield\u201d.<\/p>\n

I can see why people wouldn\u2019t like that, (laughs)<\/strong><\/p>\n

(Luaghs) Yeah, it\u2019s unfortunate, but the thing is it also works.\u00a0 I don\u2019t use it all the time, but there will be a rare occasion where it\u2019s called for where the girl is just being rude or something.\u00a0 Sometimes you have to be like, \u201chey you need to act like a lady.\u201d<\/p>\n

If she\u2019s rude, then what\u2019s the point if even continuing to talk to her?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Sometimes, they could be interesting and beautiful.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Yeah, but interesting and beautiful bitch, is still a bitch. So why do you want to talk to a bitch?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Right, but here\u2019s the thing, a lot of women who are attractive get approached by a lot of guys.\u00a0 So they put up these shields in order to weed out the weak ones.\u00a0 Kinda like saying \u201cif you\u2019re not capable of handling me , you\u2019re not capable of\u00a0 test you don\u2019t\u00a0 deserve to be in my company.\u201d<\/p>\n

Let me give you this example, let\u2019s say you\u2019re walking along a Cliffside and you want to get up the cliff and you see a rope, what is your first natural instinct?\u00a0 Test the rope!\u00a0 You grab and pull to make sure it doesn\u2019t break.<\/p>\n

So being a bitch, or being bitchy is a protective instinct that women have, and I don\u2019t blame women for that.\u00a0 It\u2019s actually a good thing it protects women from the losers , freaks and guys that can\u2019t handle her.<\/p>\n

Well, as a chick, if I\u2019m being mean to someone it\u2019s because I have zero interest in them, the more you talk to me the more you\u2019re just going to piss me off.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well at that point, the man has failed.<\/p>\n

I was raised in a different culture I guess, I was raised not to ever give your number to any man that comes up to you on the street.\u00a0 So I always feel bad for guys that do that hit on me, even if I find them attractive I\u2019m not going to give them my number or engage them I\u2019m just going to keep it moving.\u00a0 Does that give me a bitch aurora? <\/strong><\/p>\n

Well if that\u2019s the way you were raised, you really can\u2019t say that you\u2019ve never given out your number-<\/p>\n

No, I really never have. <\/strong><\/p>\n

So you\u2019re telling me that you go to a coffee shop or grocery store and there\u2019s a cute guy who\u2019s very sincere-<\/p>\n

Nope, never done that. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Okay, that kinda different.<\/p>\n

Yeah, I\u2019m a weirdo. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Most women will give out their number even if they aren\u2019t that interested in the guy.\u00a0 This is something people ask me about all the time-\u201cWhy would she give me the number if she\u2019s not going to pick up the phone?\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s because women in America, and most places, are taught by their parents and society to be nice.\u00a0 Don\u2019t ruffle feathers or be mean to people, so even if they\u2019re not interested women will give out their number so they\u2019re not mean to men face to face.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s an answer to what a lot of guys take issue with, they get a number but the girl never picks up.<\/p>\n

Unless that chick is me and I just say ,\u201cNo\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

(Laughs) Well how do you meet men?<\/p>\n

Usually it was, people I met through school or someone that I was in a situation where I repeatedly saw them.\u00a0 So it was just like \u201cHi potential date rapist, here is my number.\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n

That\u2019s what we call social circle dating.\u00a0 That\u2019s generally where most people will find their girlfriend. The cold approach is actually pretty uncommon most people meet their mate in a sort of social setting.<\/p>\n

Are you teaching guys how to find life partners or how to hook up? I mean you can go on craigslist and hook up for free.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well the Internet is a lot different for Asian guys, especially if you\u2019re doing interracial.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>There are whole sites built around women just looking for Asian guys. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Yeah, (laughs) I\u2019ve been to those, they\u2019re (pause) whatever.\u00a0 To answer your question, I keep neutral in that regard. I do think if you\u2019re going to find the woman of your dreams you have to become the man of her dreams.\u00a0 A lot of the men that get into this don\u2019t have a lot of experience with women.\u00a0\u00a0 One of the elephants in the room, so to say is that for a man to have confidence with women he needs experience.\u00a0\u00a0 Experience in dating or in bed, he needs to have exposure.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been doing this for five years and have guys emailing or I see them on Facebook and they\u2019re married now or have been with the same woman for years.\u00a0 We had one guy I remember from San Francisco, he met his girlfriend on the third night of a program and they\u2019ve been dating for the past 2 years.<\/p>\n

Guys getting into this sometimes believe that they just want a hook up a lot, but as they acquire more of the social and sexual experience that desire changes.\u00a0 They want to find \u201cthe one\u201d.<\/p>\n

My guy William, who runs the better Asian man, when he got into he, was like 30 and he was just so done. He was ready to give up on America and move back to Taiwan or Hong Kong when he started the program.\u00a0 He got his first successful hook up on the second night.\u00a0 So he just thought this is what I want to do, have hook up after hook up, but after about six months he started settling down with one girl and eventually thinking about marriage. He transformed from being a player to someone that can think about the long term.<\/p>\n

Another guy I remember was this Korean virgin who ended up marrying a black girl he met in a New York coffee shop.<\/p>\n

Each guy getting into this has different goals, and I\u2019m not here to judge I\u2019m only here to provide the system, foundation and support that they need to acquire that goal.<\/p>\n

Since you brought up sex, I\u2019m curious what do you teach your students about sex and sensuality?\u00a0 You know what blog I\u2019m interviewing you for, so spill. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Well, we\u2019re predominantly the pick up portion if you will.\u00a0 I mean there\u2019s something we talk about called \u201clast minute resistance\u201d to make sure there are no reservations at the end.\u00a0 We give some basics on sex ed., always making sure that you wrap it up and things of that nature.\u00a0 The actual sexual techniques one thing we stress is foreplay, at least 30 to 40 minutes just on her.\u00a0 Especially guys that are less experienced and might be one-minute men.\u00a0 The best way to be invited back to have sex is pleasing her.<\/p>\n

We\u2019re not really a sex ed. Industry though there are those that specialize in that particular portion.<\/p>\n

Good job, I\u2019m sure a lot of women out there should be thanking you for that. Most women won\u2019t be able to cum without at least 20 minutes of continuous stimulation.\u00a0 Thumbs up to you, sir. <\/strong><\/p>\n

(laughs)<\/p>\n

Now to jump subjects a bit I wanted to ask about, I guess the racial representation of women in the PUA community. I\u2019ve notices in a lot of the sites, especially those targeting Asian men, there seems to be a point to show Asian men with a very specific type of woman. She\u2019s tall and blonde.\u00a0 I remember when I was younger seeing sites like \u201cBetter Asian Man\u201d and thinking I guess the only way for Asian men to be better is to snag a white chick.\u00a0 Is there a particular reason you think for this being a prevalent image? <\/strong><\/p>\n

Well in the larger PUA community they don\u2019t really racialize it, but I have noticed is a lot of \u201cPick Up Artists\u201d do is they\u2019ll target Asian girls, because its easier for white men to get with them.\u00a0 I know that\u2019s not always true all the time, but because of the social hierarchy there is that factor in play.\u00a0 The reason why we emphasize it is because it IS more difficult.\u00a0 Guys might say we\u2019re just reinforcing the stereotype but one out four Asian girls don\u2019t marry Asian guys, that\u2019s not including the rate of Asian girls that are cohabitating with someone non-Asian.<\/p>\n

The marriage out rate amongst Asian men is, I forget the statistic but it\u2019s the lowest among any group. [Author\u2019s note: \u00a0In 2008, 20% of Asian men married non-Asians, but 9% of Black women married non Blacks, making them the lowest of any group.] \u00a0\u00a0The statistics show that Asian women outperform Asian men sexually, they lose their virginity earlier, go out on more dates, have more sex partners on average than Asian men.\u00a0 Again you can say I\u2019m reinforcing the stereotypes but that\u2019s true, regardless of if I say it or not. <\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>There’s a lot of Black women who are single and there’s not as much, you know, and when you see a lot of programmes that are supposed to be for men to get together, it’s still not as racialized as I see the Asian pick up community where it’s like if you look at the website, they pretty much make a point that there’s going to be a blonde white chick on that website, maybe a brunette maybe<\/em>. You talk about the social hierarchy \u2013 do you think that’s just a remnant of it?<\/strong><\/p>\n

There\u2019s two aspects of it, Asian on Asian game normal, and doesn\u2019t really require an extra skill set, other than being a normal, confidant guy.\u00a0 As a result of the social hierarchy, certain disparities and biases that exist for an Asian man to go outside of his race it requires a higher-level skill set.\u00a0 It\u2019s not because Asian men are lacking but because society has this inherent streak of prejudice, seeing Asian men at a lower level. I remember reading that in Black churches, Black women are encouraged to only court other Black people.<\/p>\n

That article, I believe I know the one you posted a while ago. I think that was more saying that Black American women are too religious for refusing to settle and marry a man who isn’t as religious as them, which is pretty hard to find in this country.<\/strong><\/p>\n

The marriage rate of Black men is pretty high; it’s comparable, if not more so, than Asian women. I also know that for Black females there’s certain dissatisfaction with that status quo. Like \u2018White girls are taking the Black men\u2019. So you have to ask yourself would it not be in their better interest if Black women were expand their horizons to include other men and races.<\/p>\n

If that\u2019s their choice, but as a Black girl, you could expand your horizons all you want, doesn’t mean that anybody wants to join you on that journey. I\u2019ve fucked a lot of Asians dudes\u2026 haven\u2019t met a lot of their parents. <\/strong><\/p>\n

I absolutely agree. My parents are pretty racist \u2013 at least my stepdad is. So you’re absolutely right in that regard. But I also know that for Asian guys when we tell them to \u2018Go up to that Black girl and tell her she’s gorgeous\u2019, in a certain way there’s a lot more resistance to that. It’s not because of social hierarchy, more like a Black girl is definitely not going to like an Asian guy. Every time they do it and it works they’re incredibly… they’re more surprised by that than when a White girl responds very positively. There aren’t that many White\/Asian role models if you will \u2013 media imagery reinforcement. It’s almost non-existent when it comes to seeing a Black girl liking Asian men.<\/p>\n

In all my experience, they have a perception that Black girls do not like Asian men. Whatever prejudice you believe that a White girl has against Asian men, it’s double for Black girls. Sometimes you have to put it out there, there’s always going to be a certain amount of prejudice. One thing about Asian guys is that they feel that Black women are definitely not for Asian\/Black couples until they actually experience it for themselves.<\/p>\n

You did bring up a really good point with Asian male perception of their options when it comes to dating. What do you in particular do that helps Asian guys just be able to get out there?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Out in the dating scene?<\/p>\n

Yeah, you mentioned the media and a lot of other societal forces, do you think that just inherently discourages Asian guys from dating?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Yeah, I mean again this is a very complex subject and there’s a lot of internal and external factors at play. The only part of the Universe that you can be sure of improving is yourself.<\/p>\n

You can worry- I know so many Asian guys, especially when I was in college and so I got talking to other Asian guys and becoming like that bitter angry Asian man. Like \u2018Goddammit, the media is always putting us down\u2019 and so you end up just staying on form and angry and bitchy and just not being productive and participating as a member of society or when you do…<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Yeah I went on a lot of dates with those guys\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n

Yes, so it’s like a poison to your confidence. It’s like a virus, I mean the more you think about it, the more it’s going to undermine your own confidence. Unhappiness with yourself, not only with yourself but other women and people in general. You know, instead of being like a positive influence, like an interesting and like we said fun up artist, you are being angry about something that you have no control over. The only thing that you have control over 100% of the time is you.<\/p>\n

So you know I think the big thing of taking guys out there is… like you know the programme, we kind of specialise in Asians, but I want to make a note that we don’t you know… like over 25% of our clients are non Asian, from Black to White. In our programme itself, there aren’t a lot of \u201cRace tactics\u201d, the game itself is not particularly different. You simply have to game harder and game better because you have like this prejudice in society. It’s a small prejudice, but it exists and it exerts an influence upon us.<\/p>\n

So there are particular tactics as an Asian guy \u2013 you have to be different or you just maybe sometimes have to be better. One of the big things is when a guy, when a student, they see like me or they see like one of my coaches who is Asian and not necessarily tall and good looking being successful with a woman, whether she’s White, Asian or Black, that right there is pretty much the eye opener and they\u2019re like hey if he can do it, I can do it. Because dating is an oral tradition, you know passed down from the father to the son, the brothers or whatever, your male peer group. You look at different cultures, whether they’re Italian American or African American, there’s a certain inherent dating knowledge that’s passed on, as opposed to like for Asian Americans where that isn’t passed on.<\/p>\n

There is no way that my stepdad could teach me anything about how to pick up a girl here in America. There’s nothing that he could tell me that would be absolutely of any help. I think that’s true for a lot of us whose parents were immigrants. So, you know that oral tradition is broken. When they see me being successful and not caring that people are judging me and caring that White guys are staring me down or Black guys are staring me down.<\/p>\n

You’d be amazed at how many guys are mad dogging me if I’m with a Black girl or a White girl \u2013 it’s amazing. But you just don’t care. The magnitude of your success is equal to the magnitude of your haters. <\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Maybe I\u2019m a weirdo, or because I\u2019m in the NYC Metro area, but whenever someone asks me \u2018Don\u2019t you feel weird dating an Asian when people are staring at you?\u2019 I\u2019m always like\u2026 If I\u2019m with a guy and I\u2019m paying more attention to the people staring at us he\u2019s not really worth being with.\u00a0 Also who the hell is staring everyone\u2019s a mutt over here. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Yeah that\u2019s true to a certain extent.\u00a0 Well, when I was living in Texas I\u2019d be kicked out of clubs, not so much in Dallas, but rural areas like Fort Worth.\u00a0 I decided that I just need to leave.\u00a0 Those guys did not want me there with those girls.<\/p>\n

I guess you\u2019re a little more cosmopolitan and worldly in that regard, but there\u2019s a lot of pressure on the guy.\u00a0 It\u2019s simply a sign of respect.\u00a0 There\u2019s been time where I\u2019ll have things going well with a girl and I\u2019d walk away to use the restroom and these guys would just descend upon her.\u00a0 They\u2019re thinking \u2018If she liked that short Asian guy she\u2019s going to LOVE me\u2019, and there\u2019ve been scuffles. Simply because some tall good-looking white guy thinks he can obviously out compete me.<\/p>\n

I know you look at it from your perspective, but from the male perspective there\u2019s always going to be competition and it gets worst the more beautiful the girl is.<\/p>\n

I guess as a female, I usually look at how a guy reacts to other people- like I was on this date the other day, sweetest man I\u2019ve ever met \u2013I took his virginity and he was like 36- <\/strong><\/p>\n

(Laughs) wow, good for you.<\/p>\n

Oh, if I had a \u201cJust took his virginity\u201d punch card it would be full two times over, but when I went on a date with this guy, there was a crazy New Israelite Black Panther dude with a yarmulke and dashiki on screaming at us as we walked by.\u00a0 Calling us slurs and what not and I looked at my date and I sort of felt like; if he didn\u2019t say anything or react he\u2019s not worth it in the long run.\u00a0 Sadly he didn\u2019t, I guess that was a \u201clady test\u201d. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Yeah, it was.<\/p>\n

I still adore the guy anyway, I\u2019m weird. <\/strong><\/p>\n

I wish I understood more female psychology. Like I said its part of the art, there\u2019s certain things women expect of you.\u00a0 In those situations its hard to judge, you can say to yourself, \u2018if I say anything I could exacerbate the situation\u2019, and no one wants a violent confrontation. If someone is willing to yell like that on the street\u2026\u00a0 You have a split second to weigh all the pros and the cons.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately for me my reaction is to yell right back, so I\u2019m sure I failed his \u201cMan Test\u201d. I felt really bad afterwards when I realized I probably just emasculated my date. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Yeah\u2026 especially if you\u2019re throwing in the race factor into an already merky situation.\u00a0 Dating is complicated enough then you throw in the race stuff.\u00a0 In a minefield, what can you really do about it?<\/p>\n

Well, I don\u2019t know if it so much psychology but the mood of the girl. I used to be engaged to a Native Korean \u2026 we were walking down the street in my hometown and some dude yelled out something slick. My man\u2019s reaction was to punch him in the face.\u00a0 I was not happy about that. <\/strong><\/p>\n

(Laughs) Guys just can\u2019t win with you can he?<\/p>\n

(Laughs) Well I was much younger, not used to violence. It depends on the girl. I think there\u2019s more too it than just one psychological reaction for women. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Like I said from the very beginning, as much as we study psychology to get better at this, every woman is an individual.\u00a0 There\u2019s a thousand different variables that controls, your likes, dislikes there\u2019s not science behind it.\u00a0\u00a0 One of the mythologies of the community is that you can practice game and you can automatically get any woman you want. The reality is pretty far from that.\u00a0 You don\u2019t learn Jedi mind tricks.\u00a0 I think its more healthy to look at it as becoming a better man so you can be with the women you want to be with. \u00a0So if you want to meet Mrs. Right or Ms. Right-Now its about being a better man.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Sounds like a healthy outlook, I\u2019ve thought that it would be sort of soul crushing for a guy to pay thousands of dollars for a boot camp or books and then run into a woman like me. If I don\u2019t like you there\u2019s nothing you can say or do. I don\u2019t like you.\u00a0 I know within 5 seconds of talking to you how I\u2019m going to shoot you down. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Exactly.\u00a0 The battle is won before it\u2019s even fought. The attraction happens before you even open your mouth. Its how you act\u00a0 and the mental process. For those guys that aren\u2019t experienced it\u2019s a revelation.\u00a0 Guys always focus on , what to say , like what lines to use in reality its not that important.\u00a0 You need to just be able to talk.<\/p>\n

For instance when I made the cover of AsianWeek, one of my clients was Singaporean so he had this accent-<\/p>\n

I love Singaporean accents, they are so fucking sexy. <\/strong><\/p>\n

(Laughs) Well he had this accent, and I tell him to go up to a girl and tell her \u201cYou\u2019re fucking adorable.\u201d And he did it with his accent and you know it works. \u00a0\u00a0For a lot of Asian guys where English is not your first language it\u2019s harder to master that flowing banter like conversation.\u00a0 So you have to more physically convey that fun, that energy and that confidence.\u00a0 So your game is more through the words that are unspoken.<\/p>\n

What is your goal with the ABC\u2019s of Attraction?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Well here\u2019s an interesting statistic in 2020, there\u2019s going to be 20 million Asian men with no hope of getting a bride because of the Chinese one child policy. \u00a0So can you imagine the social pressure of those men who never had a girlfriend going out to Russia, or South East Asia or Africa.\u00a0\u00a0 On a social and sexual level, I think it was Russia that was trying to raise a law anti-miscegenation laws that would bar Chinese men from marry Russian women.<\/p>\n

Well I know countries like Israel and a few others actually already have that law, America used to have that law. <\/strong><\/p>\n

The point is there\u2019s this huge pressure that\u2019s building up.\u00a0 There\u2019s never been 20 million men in history that could not get a wife. There\u2019s not going to be enough Chinese women to go around.\u00a0 I want my company to expand for that.<\/p>\n

So you want to be in China by 2020?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Yeah, there\u2019s not even 20 million Asian Americans.\u00a0 I would also like to go into general self-help. There\u2019s a lot of\u00a0 issues that Asians deal with that aren\u2019t touched on by the general population.<\/p>\n

In the immediate term I\u2019ve been working on my book. Its about 200 pages I\u2019m finally getting back to it.\u00a0\u00a0 I\u2019ve been in this industry for five years and my company doesn\u2019t have that many products to sell.\u00a0 We\u2019ve been very focused on services, instead of products but there\u2019s been such a demand that we\u2019re trying to satisfy that as well.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>So where can my readers find out more about you and your company? <\/strong><\/p>\n

They can go to www.abcsofattraction.com<\/a> or they can go to my blog<\/a>, with over 850 free posts.<\/p>\n

We try to make our program for everybody even though we are minority owned and operated.\u00a0 I think we have a great understanding of racism and how to deal with it.\u00a0 We want to help Asian Americans be more successful, you can\u2019t change what the media says about you, you can only change what you do in your life and how you deal with people.<\/p>\n

90% of the non-Asian girls that I\u2019ve dealt with romantically or sexually have never been with an Asian guy- not because they were against it but because no Asian ever talked with them. \u00a0I\u2019d like to think we are encouraging this generation of Asian men to be successful and to be confident. So the next generation won\u2019t have the same problems.<\/p>\n

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