{"id":446,"date":"2010-04-24T02:51:46","date_gmt":"2010-04-24T06:51:46","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blasianbytch.com\/?p=446"},"modified":"2013-01-15T14:39:24","modified_gmt":"2013-01-15T19:39:24","slug":"5-things-you-see-in-porn-you-shouldnt-do-while-having-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blasianbytch.com\/?p=446","title":{"rendered":"5 Things You See in Porn You Shouldn’t Do While Having Sex"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Pornography is consumed by all types of people, and indulges our wildest fantasies but many forget that it\u2019s just that \u2013 a fantasy. I know I\u2019ve been with men that seem to not grasp that simple fact. Watching porn will not teach you how to be the world greatest lover no more than watching ER will make you a doctor. To spare the vaginas and moral of up and coming lovers I\u2019ve made a list of the 5 Things You See in Porn That You Should Never Actually Do During Sex<\/p>\n

5. \u00a0 \u00a0Go Balls Deep in a Total Stranger RAW<\/h2>\n

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Its almost a clich\u00e9, the hot chick needs a service rendered and somehow manages to sex the delivery boy, plumber, Rabbi or whoever it is she needs something from.<\/p>\n

These two or more strangers get it on and there\u2019s not a condom to be seen. No discussion of sexual history, birth control, or any of the things you should know about a person before you let them put their genitals on you.<\/p>\n

In the real world porn stars need to take a test every month to make sure that STDs and AIDS don\u2019t spread among actors. As for birth control I assume they take care of that on their own. Unfortunately most people are not porn actors and barely will get tested ever year let alone every month.<\/p>\n

No matter what anyone tells you sex enough people raw and you ARE going to get something.<\/p>\n

Even porn stars might have to keep it a little more real if the AIDS Healthcare Foundation gets someone to sponsor their bill<\/a>, which would hold porn producers to the same standards as hospitals when it comes to preventing the spread of disease. So wrap it up kids.<\/p>\n

4. \u00a0 \u00a0 Don\u2019t Spit on my Vagina!<\/h2>\n

Don\u2019t spit in it, pour liquor (not matter how expensive), or insert fruit into my vagina. While these acts have been showcased numerous times in \u201cromantic \u201c or \u201cporn for women\u201d this is a horrible thing to do.<\/p>\n

Alcohol, Sugar and most chemicals should never be put inside a woman. You see the vagina is moist, dark and hot, when you add something like sugar it\u2019s the perfect breeding ground for bacteria and fungus.<\/p>\n

What you usually see in a movie is a tease that might lead one to believe that chocolate, or fruit has actually been inside the actress, but that\u2019s easy to achieve with editing. Not to mention that the actress can quickly wash and resume shooting. Most couples don\u2019t yell, \u201ccut\u201d after foreplay.<\/p>\n

\"choco

Just to be clear, it\u2019s totally cool to make candy in the shape a pussy just don\u2019t put it inside one.<\/p>\n

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There is just no good reason to put peanut butter, wine or any other crap that belongs in a kitchen in chocha, NONE. \u00a0If it is\u00a0stank\u00a0you shouldn’t be eating it and trying to “flavor it” is just going to make it worst.<\/p>\n

And don\u2019t spit on my vagina, there is nothing that kills the mood faster than some asshole hawking a logy up my birth canal. I implore any woman that digs this act to please leave a comment and explain, because I\u2019m baffled.<\/h6>\n
\u00a0You spit on the graves of your enemies, not on cherished birth canals. It\u2019s like spitting directly into the winking eye of God. Not a good look.<\/h6>\n

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3. \u00a0 \u00a0 Attempt to go through the entire Kama Sutra in one session.<\/h2>\n

Porn positions look amazing, because that is their main purpose to LOOK good. If they actually feel good really isn\u2019t the director\u2019s issue. All they want are positions that allow them to film penetration from multiple angles.<\/p>\n

Positions aren\u2019t picked because they feel just that damn good, in fact most \u201cporn\u201d positions for me at least kind of suck. They are awkward, intimacy-blocking ventures that rarely hit the right spots.<\/p>\n

\"Snuggie-Sutra<\/a><\/p>\n

The Snuggie Sutra should also be handled one\u00a0position\u00a0at a time.<\/p>\n

Another thing they do in porn that can just be bloody annoying is switch positions ever five seconds. How is one supposed to orgasm if as soon as you get into a position its time to change? \u00a0Of course this is mostly the fault of editing. The positions are usually happening out of sequence and to completion.<\/p>\n

While its fun to watch being an actual participant in a sexual contortion show might prove to be mighty disappointing. Especially since actors in porn are professionals, they spend their time making sure they can twist , pump, contort and what have you. YOU do not. So most of the positions you try to emulate will either make you very sore or cost you a trip to the doctor.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s unfortunate that so many \u201clearn\u201d sex through pornography, it\u2019s not exactly going to teach you how to make your partner feel good.<\/p>\n

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2. \u00a0 \u00a0Play shitty music<\/h2>\n

Porn Music and Bad Music are almost synonymous with each other. Some would ask why does porn even have music when 89% of the time it\u2019s watched with the volume muted.<\/p>\n

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You might think a bad soundtrack isn\u2019t going to make or break a sexual encounter. Well obviously you\u2019ve never put your ITunes to random only to blasted with an embarrassing song mid coitus.\u00a0Even more important than mood, music during sex might make or break a man\u2019s stroke game.<\/p>\n

According to science and numerous studies even as babies humans recognize and imitate aural rhythm patterns. This could be anything as simply as tapping your fingers on the arm of your chair to tapping dat ass. Sadly most of the awful public domain soft jazz used in porn lacks percussion.<\/p>\n

While there ARE a lot of porn that use fake hip-hop in the background most of the words are even more distracting than a young money song. (Looking at You Nikki Minaj, pussy on his sideburns seriously, wtf?)<\/p>\n

According to a 1998 study the best music to make love to be actually Latin and African inspired genres with upbeat tempo. They prompted men to thrust deeper and at the most steady and frequent pace.<\/p>\n

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1. \u00a0 \u00a0Feedback less Fucking and Faking it<\/h2>\n