You Knew This Day Would Come, Get Ready for Hamiltoe

Like this but with fucking.

Unless you’ve lived under a rock or just awoke from a sitcom coma you fell into January 2015 you’ve heard of Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Hamilton. The surprise broadway sensation based on a mix tape inspired by Ron Chernow’s biography of Alexander Hamilton recently won 11 Tony’s, a Pulitzer and a Grammy.  Since we live in a the darkest timeline anything getting this much media buzz gets a porn “parody” treatment.

The same studio that brought us Strokemon, Assventure Time and Fap to the Future announced on today that they will be releasing Hamiltoe, a XXX porn parody.  WoodRocket projects the feature will début on their site in August. The mastermind behind, Lee Roy Myers, says, “Hamiltoe will be revolutionary. It will be the first hip-hop porn musical spoofing a Broadway show, celebrating a historical figure. And it will have anal sex.”

Yeah, same guy that wrote the music for this. 

Hamiltoe will be directed by Lee Roy Myers (Game of Bones), written by comedian Eitan Levine (Elite Daily), produced by Seth’s Beard (Strokémon), featuring music by D-Squared (Ten-Inch Mutant Ninja Turtles).

The feature is still being cast so it’s too early to tell if Myers will  include as diverse a cast as the parody’s source material.  I’m not going hold my breath, this is the same site that made an all female Archer porn parody photo shoot with a white Lana and a skinny non-coked up Pam. Hopefully this will turn out better than the Walking Dead Parody and awkward white rap aside hope its better than the Glee parody.


This is now hella creepy in hindsight, as it turns out one of the stars of the show was an actual pedophile and the porno is a bunch of students sleeping with their teachers to save an underfunded after school program.

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Author: N'jaila

N'jaila Rhee grew up in north New Jersey and graduated with a degree in Journalism and Communication media from Rutgers University in 2009. Rhee began exotic dancing while attended classes at Rutgers, and still dances at special events. Currently working professionally in media in the NYC metro area, she enjoys writing erotica, eating Nilla wafers and giggling at the word "balls".