My Blogging Story

I was talking to a good friend of mine who complained that I don’t talk about myself enough on my own blog. Honestly I don’t think I’m the world’s most interesting person – but to appease a buddy I wrote and submitted a blogging story to the Black Weblogs Awards and I’d thought I’d share it with all of you.

Everyone Wins at Strip Guitar Hero
I started in my senior year of college. I was a broke overworked fulltime student with 3 jobs one of which was exotic dancing.

It started out as a AdultFriend Finder blog, I was a little shocked that the ramblings of a chubby co-ed stripper would be so popular with so many different types of people.   I expanded to a platform that facilitated better communication and then my own domain.

I had a very interesting time talking about the humorous side of sex and sexuality for an entire year before I moved to my own domain.   Writing was my way of reclaiming myself and giving myself a voice.  As a professional journalist and an exotic dancer you are trained to have a certain level of detachment with your subject matter.  Blogging is completely different and made me feel like I reclaimed that little piece of humanity lost to become a journalist/booty shaker.

After I graduated, and realized a Print Journalism degree would be worth more if printed on toilet paper, blogging was my way to keep a smile on my face and keep my skills sharp until the newspaper industry stops imploding.

But more than just a cheap substitute for professional achievement, for me has been my way of making Black/Asian sexuality less taboo and alien, especially to Black women.  I’ve encouraged other women to write erotica explore their sexuality and to look at people in the adult industry differently.  There’s something wrong when a grown woman needs another persona to explore their sexual identity *Beyonce* or measures the goodness of a person’s heart by the tally on their bedpost.  Sexuality is a part of a whole being, denying it is self-destruction.

I’ve noticed for too long the sexual expression of Black women has been vilified, I write because I want to change that.  I grew up a “mixed” girl, who didn’t look all that mixed.  Instead of feeling like I came out wrong or damaged I embraced my Black sensuality and express it with great ease.   That can be through erotic fiction or just talking frankly about masturbation and finding humor in the way humans have found to pleasure themselves.

Hopefully by having these frank discussions about the sexual mystique of Blacks and Asians , childish stereotypes can be dispelled.  And if not, we can always make ourselves feel better by laughing at weird sex toys and looking at sexy people.

You can still Vote for until July 25th

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Author: N'jaila

N'jaila Rhee grew up in north New Jersey and graduated with a degree in Journalism and Communication media from Rutgers University in 2009. Rhee began exotic dancing while attended classes at Rutgers, and still dances at special events. Currently working professionally in media in the NYC metro area, she enjoys writing erotica, eating Nilla wafers and giggling at the word "balls".